The Danger of Wishful Thinking

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During the unprecedented times of the pandemic it is easy to daydream of better days ahead. Wishful thinking and hoping may seem harmless, but this is a habit you do not want to build during the pandemic or any other stressful time. The reason for this is because once you start putting your hope in the future, you abandon your hope and joy for the present. You are putting all your eggs in the future basket, and the future basket is not promised. Furthermore the future is not going to be happy if you are not planting the seeds now. Instead, when you are hoping for the future, what does your present look like? I will tell you. Your present is empty, like you are waiting for your life to begin. Your mind is full of restless thoughts and worry about the future. You feel like you can't control your life or your situation. These feelings make you continue to put even more faith in the idea that things will work out in the future once X happens. All of these feelings of worry and unease push your mind even further away from the current moment. You tell yourself that this is temporary and once X happens then you can focus on the rest. The problem is the more you wish and wait for X, the less you put energy to build, which not only makes your present miserable but X less likely to happen.

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If you have been following our articles for any length of time, you know that we are very big in being in the moment here at Bullionite. When you put all your hope in the future and spend your days lost in wishful thinking, you are denying yourself the joy of being in the current moment. You cannot be mindful and be putting off your goals and feelings and desires for tomorrow. Instead the energy is misdirected and unfocused. Remember we are not promised a future, all we have is right now. What do you need to be content right now? This is what you need to focus on. Of course you need goals for the future, but how you approach the goals is not by wishing for them but by breaking the tasks down to daily pieces in order to achieve those goals. Wishing is not enough, there must be intention. If you feel like you are waiting for your life to start or that you are on auto-pilot, this is a sign that you are indeed focusing your hopes on the future and not on the present. So how do you bring yourself back to the present when you notice this happening in yourself? Practice your mindfulness.

To reset yourself back into the present you can do any of your favorite mindfulness exercises from breathing to body scans. We have several mindfulness exercises here. For me, my favorite hard reset is to go for a run (or you can walk) for 10 to 15 minutes. No music, no distraction just simply observe everything on your journey. This is not about exercise per se, though pushing yourself to a state of cardio can force you into your body as you feel your pulse quicken and breath deepen, but about being in nature and silent. Allow yourself to feel everything, start with your feet. Feel the rhythm and pressure of the ground hitting your feet and feel that vibration work its way up your legs. Feel your hip joints working and your belly filling and emptying with air. Hear your heartbeat quicken and your breath enter your nose and mouth. Work your arms in unison with your legs. Look around yourself and see the neighborhood or area you are moving through, take time to engage in smelling the pleasant or unpleasant smells you experience as you run. Feel the wind against your skin. Empty your mind and just focus on all of these sensations. This is the moment. This is all you have. Are you happy? Are you content? If not, why?

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If you do not have the time or ability to go for a walk or run, then simply get up and walk away from the space you have been in for awhile. Get a glass of water or rinse your face and go through the same body scan there. For example, let your hand sit in the water for a minute and feel the temperature change. Splash the front of your face and feel the body's reaction to the water. We will get into this in another article, but the heart rate automatically decreases when your face is submerged or splashed with water. It is an instant stress release or reset which can be utilized whenever you feel yourself slipping under the spell of future thinking. Once you are done with this, you can continue with a writing exercise.

When you get back to your home and you don't have a clear objective in your head, sit down for a writing exercise. Get your favorite writing instrument and ask yourself, what do you need to be content right now. Then proceed to make a list of things blocking you from getting that thing. Next, ask yourself, what is one or two of your major goals you have in life and what do you need in order to achieve these goals? You may already have this list from our Goal Setting article here. If so, simply take a moment to reread your plan and remember what you need to be focusing on daily. Of course with the current situation there may be many reasons why you can not achieve your daily or monthly tasks at the moment, and this is ok. Instead, focus on what you need to be content right now. No more wishful thinking, no more daydreaming, put into action what you need to be here now. Reach out to us at info@bullionite.com with your comments or questions!