Are you happy right now? If not, why? Are you waiting to achieve a certain goal, hit a certain income bracket, meet your spouse, have a child, in order to feel happiness? Many of us live this way, I know I have been a victim of having tunnel vision in the past and not taking time to enjoy my journey, but what is there to be done about this? The phenomena we are describing is called, Destination Addiction and it is something we all can fall into. To put it simply, destination addiction is when we delay our own happiness and satisfaction until we meet a goal, it is the belief that success is the destination and anything before that is nothing. But if you do this, you are ultimately living your life just to end it, you aren't enjoying your journey. Destination addiction can crop up at different moments of our lives and it is important to identify when you are getting trapped in its cycle.
Why is it so damaging?
Because it steals our minds and souls away from our lives. We aren't experiencing our lives, simply waiting for them to be over. We aren't mindful, so our relationships and mental health suffer. We estrange people we love and don't even realize it. We delay our happiness so much that ultimately when we do finally achieve our goal we can not even be happy then, but simply look for the next goal to achieve. Destination addiction is harmful to not just ourselves, but our loved ones. So how do you know if you are suffering from it? Follow these symptoms and see where you stand.
You are Always Looking for the Next Thing
When you are doing a task at work, you are waiting for it to be finished so you can start the next one. When you are having dinner with loved ones, you are making a to-do list in your head for when it is over. You are never truly in the moment but simply waiting for the moments to end.
Always in a Hurry
I'm late, I'm late, for a very important date! You are like the white rabbit in Alice in Wonderland, always looking at the time and rushing. Even if you do not necessarily have something you need to do, you are rushing. If you see a friend at the store or somewhere, you can not stop because you are on such a tight schedule. While we all have those days, this is something more. You spread yourself so thin that you never have a moment for yourself.
Your Dream Home/ Vacation/ Spouse is Around the Corner
Whatever you have right now, it doesn't feel just right. You feel like the next one will be it, the thing that will finally make you happy, but what you have right now is lacking in some way. You are willing to sacrifice any of these things in the idea of something better because you believe that the next thing is going to be the thing that makes you happy.
FOMO: Fear of Missing Out
No matter what you are doing, you worry someone else is having a better time than you right now. You never fully commit to plans in case there is something better that is coming around the corner. You could be diving in the Maldives, but still checking your phone to see if there is something you are missing out on back home.
You are Behind
No matter what, you are convinced you are a failure. You thought that by this age or this time with the company or whatever the limit is, that you would be richer, happier, more successful and because you are not any of those things you are disappointed in yourself and working even harder. You believe you only deserve happiness once you reach these goals which are always out of reach.
Do any of these sound familiar? If so then you might suffer from destination addiction, but never fear! The solution like always is mindfulness! Of course achieving mindfulness is not an overnight fix, it helps to at least know the cure is available and for the most part for free, you only need to give yourself the time and space to achieve it. If you find yourself in the above symptoms, we encourage you to take a look at our introduction to mindfulness here.
Find more of our mindfulness guides at https://www.bullionite.com/blog-index and start the journey towards mindfulness today! Reach out to us at info@bullionite.com with your questions or comments.