Three Tips To Healthier Thoughts
As we approach a new beginning it is so important to have the right mindset. It is so easy to get into damaging thinking and become our own worst enemies. What do I mean by this? I mean that our inner dialog is the most important conversation we have every day. Think about it. Every moment of us being awake we are in a conversation with ourselves. The nature of that conversation though, is up to you. Look back at how you speak to yourself in a day, are you hopeful, mean, demanding, sympathetic? Often we are our own worst critics and while that may be a great motivator to get through a particularly rough patch of work, it can be more damaging in the long run. But what do we do if it turns out we do speak to ourselves in a nasty way? How do we become our own best friend instead of our worst enemy? While there is no overnight solution there are several ways you can start amending your inner dialog. I personally find that what often leads me to negative self-talk is when I expect too much of myself, which often comes from unrealistic expectations of what I can accomplish in a certain amount of time. Time management can be one key to a more healthy relationship with yourself.
1- Know When You Need a Rest
First you need to see how you even talk to yourself, notice when you start getting mean with yourself and make a note of it. Now ask yourself, did talking down to yourself help you or did it make you go into a spiral of doubt for 30 minutes when you could have benefited more from a break? A lot of times we work ourselves for far too long without a break, especially when deadlines are looming. While it may seem productive to skip lunch or not move from your desk for hours, often it results in fatigue that ruins the flow for the rest of the day. You start demanding that you finish these tasks and where it should have taken you 5 minutes, it takes you 20, because you are exhausted. When you notice yourself start to talk negatively to yourself the first thing you should do is to take a break. Go get a snack or stretch out a little, just moving from the desk can do a world of good.
2- Write Reasonable To Do Lists
How often does this happen to you: you start writing your to do list for the day and the next thing you know you have written a page and half of tasks? I know this is something I do to myself all the time. While I realize I can not get all those things done, I will still try to accomplish as much as I can and end up feeling defeated at the end of the day when I somehow couldn't accomplish 10 hours worth of tasks in 6 hours. The first step to respecting your body and your needs is to manage expectations for your day. Yes you can make yourself do 15 tasks in one day, but likely the next day you will accomplish nothing. Instead, dedicate yourself to a certain amount of time each day dedicated to your tasks, when you are done with that time period, that is it. You may not even finish one task in a day if it happens to be a very involved one but you put effort in and leave the day with energy so you can come back tomorrow and tackle the task again. Learn to allow yourself to have free time, and don't let your to do list take over your entire life.
3- Give Yourself Decompression Time
Another time I find myself talking to myself poorly is when I haven't given myself enough time for myself. I work till bedtime or I am too exhausted to do anything else and pass out asleep with no assessment of my day. I wake up the next day too early and panicked, often unable to get back to sleep. This starts a day off badly and often I berate myself for bad sleeping habits and not being able to get all my tasks accomplished. Instead of falling into this trap, be sure to end your tasks several hours before bedtime. Allow yourself time to be quiet or shower, meditate, spend time with family or simply be here in the moment. Giving yourself this time to come back to yourself allows you to bask in your accomplishment of the day and gear yourself up for the next day. Sometimes we are moving so fast we fail to see just how amazing we are.
While time management is not the only factor in a healthy mindset, I find that being sure I keep track of my time helps me have a positive relationship with myself. You may have other triggers for your negative self-talk and I encourage you to check out our other articles on mindset on our blog here, and here where we took a deep dive into what mindset is and how to make the most of yours. Reach out to us at info@bullionite.com with your comments and questions.